Coming home
by Stand with Ward and Queen
Summary: A few months before the Particle Accelerator explosion, Iris has a horrible fight with Joe and Barry and leaves town. Five years later, she returns to find things are not how she left them. Not a WestAllen story.
1. The return

**This is an idea I got following a conversation with Philippe363. It was originally intended to be a one shot but, so I can properly explore the concept, I decided to stretch it out as a short story. It will probably be around three or four chapters, at most. **

**Tell me in the comments if you think it's any good or not. **

Central City

Late morning

In the back of a cab, Iris West nervously wrung her hands together as the driver headed towards her destination. After all these years, it was strange being back in Central City, Iris mused.

It had all started over five years ago, a few months before the Particle Accelerator had gone online. She had been over at her dad's and they'd gotten into a fight. At this point, Iris couldn't even remember what it was about, sadly. But she remembered that she'd said some pretty awful things to him, things that couldn't be unsaid. Iris winced as she remembered the look of pain and hurt that crossed Joe's face at the things she'd said to him.

She'd then stormed out and gone over to Barry's to vent to what she thought was a sympathetic ear. But when she told him about her fight with Joe, she could tell, even if he would never say it out loud, that Barry had more sympathy for her father than her. Her temper already blazing, Iris went off on Barry as well. Like with Joe, she said things she regretted, including a snide comment about his father. She winced as she remember the look of shock, anger, and hurt on Barry's face at the low blow.

In a single night, Iris had destroyed her relationships with the two most important people in her life. It took her a long time to accept that she was the one responsible for that. But not before she'd left town and moved to Keystone without a word to either of them. So angry was she at them, so caught up in her selfishness, she hadn't known Barry was hit in the Accelerator explosion for a year, as she'd rejected her father's calls afterwards and deleted his messages from her phone.

She'd finally found out from a conversation with a friend from Central City who was in town when they had mentioned in passing that Barry had woken up from his coma. In guilt, she'd never had the courage to call Barry and explain that her not returning or checking up on him had not been because she hadn't cared, but because she hadn't known.

After all these years, Iris decided she needed to come back to town and make things right with her dad and Barry. She could admit, finally, that she was the one in the wrong. She just hoped it wasn't too late to salvage some sort of relationship with them.

The cab stopped in front of the house she had grown up in and Iris took a shaky breath. After paying the driver, Iris got out and walked up to the front door. She rang the doorbell and waited, hoping someone would answer. After a moment, the door opened and her father stood on the other side.

He looked exactly as she remembered, Iris mused. A little more ragged, some more grey in his hair and beard and she could see some wrinkles that hadn't been there before. The look of shock and disbelief he had upon seeing her shouldn't have hurt as much as it did, but Iris knew she only had herself to blame.

"Iris?" Joe breathed as he stared at her.

"Hi dad," Iris said awkwardly. "Can I come in?"

Wordlessly, Joe stepped aside and let her in. As Joe closed the doors behind her, Iris looked around. It looked almost exactly like it had when she'd left it with a few changes. On the wall were a few new photos. There was one with her dad and a woman Iris recognized as Cecile Horton. Another had Joe, Barry, a Latino man with hair down to his shoulders and a red haired woman that appeared to have been taken at Christmas. Another had Barry with the unknown man and woman at what appeared to be a birthday party. Clearly, they were important to both Barry and her dad, Iris mused.

"What are you doing here Iris?" Joe asked after a few moments, the shock at seeing her after all this time earing off.

"I wanted to come see you, you and Barry," Iris said as she turned around to look at him, the look Joe was giving her making her feel like a little girl who had done as her daddy told her not to do again.

"Five years. Over five years ago, you walked out of this house and never looked back. You left me and Barry and never came back, not even when Barry was in a coma. So what made you come back?" Joe demanded as he crossed his arms.

"I've been trying to get up the courage to come back here for a couple years now," Iris admitted. "I didn't know Barry was in a coma, if I had I would've come back. Dad, I miss you. I miss you and Barry. I know I'm the one who left and I'm the one who ruined my relationships with both of you. I just…I'd like a chance to have back what we used to have."

Joe was silent for a few moments, regarding Iris with an unreadable look on his face. Iris was beginning to panic when Joe spoke up.

"You're my daughter and I will always love you Iris. But we will never have back what we used to have, too many things have changed," Joe said before a female voice interrupted.

"Look who woke up from her nap!" Cecile gushed as she came down the stairs, holding a baby before she paused as she saw Iris. "Oh, I didn't realize we had company."

"You have a baby," Iris said, stunned at the fact that she was a sister.

"No, I don't," Joe quickly assured her.

"We're just watching this one for her parents," Cecile said as she looked at her. "It's good to see you Iris."

"So, you've taken up babysitting?" Iris asked skeptically.

"Not exactly," Joe said as he walked over, kissing Cecile on the cheek before taking the baby and saying something that made Iris' heart stop. "Iris…this is Nora Grace Allen. Barry's daughter."


	2. Barry's new life

**Hope everyone had a good Christmas, at least those of you who celebrate it. **

**I was blown away by the response to this; I was not expecting this kind of a response. I'm glad you all like it. Without further ado, here's the next chapter.**

**GIJose: Glad you enjoyed it. Well, it's not going to be pretty, especially when she and Barry meet up again. No kidding. In all the crap we've gotten over the last few seasons, and there has been a lot of it, the one bright spot has been Joe/Cecile.**

**Guest 1: Glad to hear it.**

**Guest 2: We might get some, but this story won't be very flashback focused. **

Star Labs

Late morning

Barry stared across the room at his wife, an adoring smile on his lips as he thought about how his life had changed in the last five years.

The day Iris had left Central City; Barry wouldn't deny it and say he hadn't been hurt by what she'd said about his dad. For a long time, Iris had been his constant, the one person he was sure would have his back. The day he woke up from his coma and found out Iris had never even visited him from Joe, he knew he was wrong.

On the plus side though, this had allowed him and Joe to grow closer, especially once Joe had found out about him being The Flash. And without being so hung up on Iris, it had allowed Barry to explore his options so to speak romantically. He'd even had a brief relationship with Central City News reporter Linda Park but he'd been forced to end it once he found out Doctor Wells was the Reverse Flash, as he didn't want another person in his life in danger from Thawne.

They'd managed to stop Thawne but, unfortunately, it came at the cost of their friend Eddie's life, who had shot himself in order to take down Thawne, due to being Thawne's distant ancestor. After that, the team had broken up, in part because of Eddie's death and Ronnie Raymond sacrificing himself and in part because of Barry blaming himself for their deaths. However, after six months, Cisco, Caitlin, and Joe had decided they weren't going to let him isolate himself anymore. In hindsight, he had put too much distance between them but his guilt had been eating at him.

After reuniting as a team, that was when a man called 'Jay Garrick' had appeared to warn them of a man named Zoom from another Earth. After Wells, Barry had been unwilling to trust 'Jay', which had put him at odds with the rest of the team. It came to a boiling point between him and Caitlin.

_Three years earlier_

"_Why are you so hesitant to trust him?" Caitlin asked as she stood alone with Barry in the cortex._

"_Do you really need to ask me that?" Barry asked incredulously as he turned to face her. "After what Thawne did, do you just expect me to blindly trust someone I don't know?"_

"_Not everyone is Thawne Barry," Caitlin pointed out._

"_What's the saying, trust but verify? Until we can prove he's who he says he is, I'm not gonna let him out of that cell!" Barry snapped as he whirled around._

"_Barry-" Caitlin started._

"_If you're wrong and I let him out, I put everyone I care about at risk, again! And I would never forgive myself if anything happened to Joe, Cisco, or you because I couldn't learn from my mistakes!" Barry said passionately. _

"_Barry, we can take care of ourselves," Caitlin said as she walked over to him. _

"_And what if you can't? What if we trust him and he ends up being another Thawne?" Barry challenged and Caitlin did not have an answer. "I'm not willing to take that risk with you guys, not again. I would rather be right about him and safe than wrong and have you all die because of my mistake. I can't…I can't lose you or anyone else. I'm not strong enough for that."_

"_You're the strongest person I know Barry," Caitlin said as Barry smiled weakly._

"_I had to be. Kids are cruel, they make fun of you, especially if your dad was convicted of murdering your mother," Barry said and it was silent in the rom. "I had to look strong because they would've eaten me alive. Doesn't mean I am."_

_Caitlin reached out and pulled him into a hug, which Barry gratefully returned. They stayed like that for a moment, Barry accepting the comfort from her. Then, they pulled back slightly but didn't let go. Barry looked into her eyes, reminding himself of how pretty she was. Neither was sure who moved first, but suddenly they leaned in and their lips met in a kiss._

Now

The kiss had been unexpected on both their parts, but it had not been unwelcome, far from it. The transition from friends to more had been surprisingly natural; the emotional and physical intimacy that came with it was as easy as breathing to them. Barry felt like he'd always known her, but maybe that was just how it felt when you loved someone, Barry mused.

"What? Is something wrong?" Caitlin asked as she noticed him staring at her.

"No, nothing's wrong. I just like watching you work," Barry said with a smile.

"If you two are gonna start making out, can you please tell me so I can leave?" Cisco asked from the computers.

"It was one time!" Barry exclaimed in exasperation.

"And it's burned into my brain!" Cisco shouted back.

The couple laughed at their best friend, knowing he was only joking. The incident in question had happened about five months after Barry and Caitlin had started dating, following Barry and Cisco accompanying their friend Harry to Earth-2 in order to rescue his daughter Jesse. Cisco had walked in on Barry and Caitlin, who were caught up in a kiss following their reunion. It had been embarrassing for all three of them and Cisco never failed to tease them over it.

Suddenly, Barry's phone started ringing. Digging it out, Barry saw it was Joe and answered it.

"Hey Joe, is everything okay? Nora's not being too much trouble, is she?" Barry asked and Caitlin looked towards him at the sound of their daughter's name.

"No, she's fine. She's an angel, like usual," Joe quickly assured him. "But, when she was napping…Iris showed up."

"What?" Barry asked, sure he had misheard his former foster father. "Joe, Iris hasn't so much as sent us a post card in over five years."

"Which is why I was so shocked when she showed up on the front porch. Barry, she's back," Joe told him, shocking Barry.

West House

Not long after

Iris sat awkwardly on the couch as Joe called Barry, feeling like an intruder in this house. Sitting in the chair, Cecile held Nora as she cooed up at Cecile. Cecile kept making silly faces at Nora, causing the baby to squeal up at her. The sound made a smile cross Cecile's face every time it happened.

"So…you and my dad?" Iris asked awkwardly and Cecile finally looked over at her.

"Yeah," Cecile said as she regarded Iris with an unreadable look, making Iris feel like she was the one in need of judgement, not Cecile.

"So are you two…" Iris trailed as she looked at Cecile's hand and noticed a ring.

"We're not married, but we're engaged. The wedding is set for March," Cecile told her.

Iris nodded, her head spinning. Her dad was engaged; Barry was married and had a kid. She knew time had not stood still for Barry and Joe while she had been in Keystone but this-this was a lot for her to take in. Iris was still processing all this as Joe returned.

"I called Barry, he'll be by later," Joe told Iris before dropping a kiss on Cecile's head and smiling down at Nora.

Iris looked away, her throat tightening at the scene. It was just another reminder of how much she missed by how at ease Joe seemed around Cecile and Nora while every word he exchanged with Iris seemed strained and cordial. Not like how you'd address your daughter.

It wasn't until that moment that Iris truly realized the damage she had done. Oh, she'd known she messed up, but it wasn't until moment that she'd fully understood how much she'd broken her relationships with the two most important people in her life. Barry had gotten married and hadn't even bothered to send her an invitation, nor did he tell her that he was a father now. Judging by Nora's appearance, she was at least four months old. Her father was engaged and Iris was under no illusions about the fact that that Cecile was clearly living in this house.

Barry and Joe had not simply waited for her to come home the last five years, they had moved on with their lives. It was a bitter realization and Iris couldn't help but wonder if there was room in their new lives for her.

Star Labs

Later in the morning

Barry was on the balcony of Star Labs, staring out at the city. He was lost in thought and almost didn't hear Caitlin approach him from behind. Almost.

"You okay? You seemed upset by Joe's call," Caitlin said, as Barry had hung up and said he'd needed to be alone after his call with Joe.

"Iris is back in town, she showed up at Joe's this morning," Barry said after a moment.

"Oh," Caitlin said, not sure what to say.

Iris West had been a topic that had been scarcely broached over the last five years, but she and Cisco were very aware of who she was. Their first Christmas at the West House, she'd seen a photo of Barry and Iris as kids and had asked Joe about her. He'd simply said she was his daughter and that she'd moved away over a year earlier. It wasn't until later that she and Cisco had found out the reasons for it from Barry. Needless to say, she and Cisco had never really mentioned her since.

"How do you feel about that?" Caitlin asked her husband wearily, trying to gage his feelings on the matter.

"I don't know, I really don't," Barry sighed. "Growing up, I always had a crush on her. For a long time, I thought she was the love of my love. And then she did the one thing I thought she'd never do: she used what happened to my parents to hurt me. And when I found out she never even so much as sent me a card while I was in a coma, that's when I realized that she didn't care about me a bit. Not a damn bit. And I'm not sure I want to see her now."

"I think you should go see her," Caitlin said quietly after a moment and Barry turned to her incredulously.

"You think I should forgive her?" Barry asked in disbelief.

"No," Caitlin said immediately, placing her hand on his arm. "If someone had used my dad to hurt me the way she used your parents to hurt you, I would never forgive them. But it's obvious you still have some unresolved issues with Iris. If you don't want to see her, you don't have to; I'll even pick Nora up so you don't have to see her. But I think that if you saw her…if you finally tell her how you feel, it might give you some closure."

Barry looked thoughtful as he considered her words. Smiling, Caitlin kissed him on the cheek before letting him go.

"Whatever you decide, I'll be there for you," Caitlin told him and Barry smiled.

"I love you," Barry said and she smiled as well.

"Yeah, I had an idea," Caitlin said dryly, lifting her hand which had her wedding ring on and laughing as she walked back into the building, leaving Barry to his thoughts.

**Some of you speculated that Patty would be Nora's mother and I did consider it, but to be honest, it felt more natural for the story to have Barry's wife be Caitlin. I've always felt like, if there was no Iris, there could've been something between Caitlin and Barry and there are multiple moments in season one where it seems like Caitlin might have feelings for Barry.**

**I'll be honest, I was kind of annoyed with Team Flash in 2x02 when they were just ready to trust 'Jay' with no proof. Their scientists, they should follow the facts. And after Wells/Thawne, them trusting 'Jay' just like that was so OOC and stupid. Not to mention that Barry turned out to be right the whole time and his father paid the price because he decided to listen to Iris rather than his own instincts. **


	3. The reunion

**Happy 2020 everyone. In honor of the new year, here is the last chapter. **

**GIJose: Glad you enjoyed it. It's where I got the inspiration from. No, I don't plan to have any more flashbacks.**

**Agent N: Yep, they were always great back before Barry was a selfish jerk.**

**Wall: Yep, the show, at this point, is the WestAllen diaries, not The Flash. I'm leaving the concept of Killer Frist up for interpretation. **

**Guest 1: Glad to hear it.**

West House

Late afternoon

"I can go in and get her if you want," Caitlin offered as Barry parked the family car in the driveway of Joe's house.

Barry was suddenly thankful he had driven rather than just speeding over; it had allowed him to get his thoughts together. Otherwise, he might have decided to take Caitlin's offer, but that was the coward's way out. And Barry Allen had never been a coward.

"No. You were right earlier; I need to face Iris, even if part of me doesn't want to," Barry said with a sigh.

"I'll be there the whole time," Caitlin promised as she placed her hand on his.

Barry smiled weakly before he turned off the car. The pair then got out and walked towards the front door. Usually, Barry would just walk right in, but he thought it best to ring the doorbell this time. After a few moments that felt like an eternity to Barry, the door opened and Cecile stood on the other side.

Cecile smiled at them before gesturing at them to come in. Barry, after a brief moment of hesitation, walked in, Caitlin following him. Quickly, they spotted the Wests. Joe was sitting in his chair, holding Nora, who appeared to be asleep. And sitting on the couch, looking like she was about to face Zoom, was Iris, eying Barry like he was about to vibrate his hand through her chest.

"Hey," Barry told her awkwardly, not knowing what else to say.

"Hey," Iris said in the same tone and then silence descended on them.

"I'm Caitlin. It's nice to meet you," Caitlin said politely as she walked over, holding her hand out to Iris.

"Iris. You must be Barry's…wife," Iris said, the words feeling strange on her tongue as she shook Caitlin's hand.

"For about two years now," Caitlin said with a smile.

Iris nodded, absorbing this. Barry had been married for two years. The news made a feeling she couldn't name bubble up in her. She would later realize it was jealousy.

"And how is my little Snowflake?" Caitlin asked as she dropped Iris and walked over to Joe and Nora, smiling down at daughter as she opened her eyes and squealed as she saw Caitlin.

"She's fine, like usual she's been an angel," Joe assured her with a smile.

Seeing Barry smile at them with so much love and pride, Iris felt the strange feeling in her chest get worse. Barry looked over at Iris, the smile leaving his face at the look on her face. Something Joe picked up on.

"You know, we have her bag upstairs," Joe mentioned as he got to his feet, handing Nora to Caitlin. "In her room."

"I'll go get it," Cecile said as she quickly walked up the stairs.

"Up for a drink?" Joe asked and Caitlin, struggling to keep a straight face as she caught on, nodded as she followed Joe into the kitchen, leaving Barry and Iris alone.

"Subtle," Barry said and he and Iris shared a laugh, the tension breaking momentarily.

"Very," Iris agreed and it was quiet for a moment.

"So…what are you doing here Iris?" Barry asked, getting to the point.

"I wanted to see you, to see both of you," Iris said and Barry resisted the urge to laugh.

"Obviously not enough to come see me when I was in a coma. Or when I woke up. You didn't even call me Iris," Barry said, struggling to keep his anger in check.

"I didn't know Barry," Iris said and Barry stared at her incredulously. "When dad called about you, I never picked up and I deleted all his messages. I only found out about you for a friend a few months after you woke up."

"And you never called or came to visit after you found out," Barry noted and Iris was silent, shame faced. "But why should I be surprised right? I'm just the son of a murderer who can't accept the truth."

Iris winced, the use of her words that she'd thrown in Barry's face that night so long ago feeling like a punch to the stomach.

"I didn't mean that Barry," Iris said immediately.

"Yeah you did," Barry said confidently. "You may not have actually believed what you said, but you meant them because you wanted to hurt me. And you did."

"Barry…I'm sorry," Iris said, trying not to cry.

"I know. But it doesn't change anything. You know, when we were kids, I had a crush on you," Barry said, surprising Iris. "Everyone could see it…everyone except you. For a long time, I thought I loved you. But that night, when you said that about my dad…I realized that you didn't give a damn about me."

"That's not true Barry," Iris said immediately but Barry shook his head.

"No, it is true. Somewhere along the way, you changed from the girl who held me as I cried the night my mom was murdered. That girl would never have said the things you said to Joe that night. She would never have used my dad to hurt me. And she would have never stayed away for five years over something petty," Barry said and Iris looked on the verge of tears. "You changed Iris, and I don't like the person you've become."

"So…where do we go from here?" Iris asked, taking a few moments to compose herself.

"Well that's up to you. I don't trust you anymore, I don't even like you anymore," Barry said, not trying to be mean but being honest. "I have friends now who are there for me, who don't make fun of me."

"I never made fun of you," Iris interrupted.

"My sad, nerdy dream. Isn't that what you called my excitement about the Particle Accelerator?" Barry asked and Iris flinched. "Whether you realize it or not, you made fun of me Iris. And now I have friends who don't do that. I have Joe and Cecile. I have a daughter I adore and a wife that makes me happy to be alive. Whether you want to be a part of this or not is up to you. I will always care about you Iris…but I'm not gonna put myself and my family through trying to build a relationship with someone who doesn't care about anyone but themselves. So if you wanna leave, go back to Keystone. If not, maybe one day, we can be friends again. It's your choice Iris."

Barry then walked into the kitchen, making Iris put a hand to her face as her shoulder shook with sobs.

**So, that's it. It may seem like it has no proper ending, but the fact of the matter is that, in many situations like this, there is no proper ending or magical fix. People don't just magically get over things like this; it takes time to heal, if it ever heals. So I thought this was a nice way to end it. **


End file.
